This Comic Makes Fun of the Passengers
by Leslie Eaton, New York Times
When Rene Foss’s mother was a stewardess in the 1950’s, she wore white gloves and served lobster thermidor to passengers. Today, Ms. Foss, a flight attendant herself, says, “Some of us are wearing rubber gloves, and we have to learn how to put handcuffs on people.”
Ms. Foss, who describes herself as “36 going on about 25,” wanted to be a Broadway star; her family wanted her to have a steady job. “I can’t say I always wanted to be a flight attendant,” she said. “I just wanted to get my dad off my back.”
And so she did, and pursued a career in entertainment at the same time. With the free time her job offers, Ms. Foss was able to study singing and acting, and to write a cabaret show about flight attendants called “Around the World in a Bad Mood.” The show is occasionally performed at Rose’s Turn in Greenwich Village. (The next performance is Dec. 9.)
But there is more to the job than just time off and good material, she said, as she discovered during the year she managed a theater producer’s office. “Six months into the job, I thought, ‘My God, I can’t stand this working every day, in the same place -- I’ve got to get back to flying,’ ” she recalled. “I think it gets in your blood.”
Some of it also sticks in your craw. As depicted in her show, which she performs with another flight attendant and some professional actors, being a flight attendant is rather like being a waitress on a Greyhound bus -- with no tips.
“I’m hoping to find a job where I can deal with emotionally and physically abusive people who will blame me for everything that goes wrong in their lives, whether it’s my fault or not,” Ms. Foss’s character says while applying for a job as a flight attendant. “I also like to hang around crowded airports for hours and hours and hours with nothing to do. But most importantly, I have a particular fondness for picking up garbage. I love it.”
The skit’s biggest laugh was a recitation of the questions flight attendants are asked, all of which, Ms. Foss said, were drawn from experience.
“Will our luggage make it? Where are the bathrooms? Will I make my connection?
“Do you have raspberry-kiwi iced tea? Is that your natural color hair? Has anyone ever told you that you resemble Monica Lewinsky? What time is it? Is this your regular route? Can I borrow your pen? Can you find out the score of the game? What river is that? Where are we?
“Can I have another bag of peanuts? Doesn’t the air-conditioning work on this plane? Where do you live? Are you married? Are you divorced? Have your ever been married? Do you have a boyfriend? Have you ever had a boyfriend? How old are you? Can I have another beer?” And on and on.
The show provides passengers -- these days, almost everyone -- with some insight and inside information about flight attendants, including what they really mean when they say, sweetly, “I’ll be right back!”
^ Back to Top ^
|
